October 15, 2020
HOW THIS SCHOOL YEAR HAS ME FEELING...
October 15, 2020
By Madeleine Bhamjee, Grade 12
When I first heard about what our school year may look like, including the hybrid model, I was honestly, quite sad but not the least bit surprised. Over the course of the summer when COVID cases had dwindled, I had hoped that my school year would be completely normal, perhaps with some adjustments, but nevertheless what I was used to. However when it was announced in late August that the school year would be part online, part in class with cohorts my heart sunk.
I really do understand that I come from a very privileged place. I am fortunate to have a supportive, caring family that is able to adjust to these changes, access to technology and a support network but I can’t say that things have been how I’d have liked them… I am aware that it has been incredibly difficult for teachers and administrators to create this learning model and carry it out but so far I have found it arduous. As someone who struggles to focus and process information, sitting in class for even a short period of time has never been a walk in the park but sitting in a class for four hours is pretty hellish. At the end of the day, my head hurts after endless volleys of notes and lectures have been hurled at me.
This new school year has freed up more time in my schedule, as I attend school on and off and am productive enough that I finish my work quickly. I feel as though I am left with too much time on my hands. I thrive when I am busy, it keeps me productive and makes me feel accomplished even at my low points. Over the summer, I was lucky enough to find a job and work all summer and it felt wonderful to have a sense of purpose and belonging but now that school has begun and my days feel empty, I feel like a part of me is missing.
Maybe this is why I am writing this “rant”, because I desire to feel productive again and wish to vent my frustrations.